The Art of the Damage Control Email: Stop Trying to Win Arguments in Your Inbox

If you’re responding to client complaints via email, stop. Right now.

I know it feels safer. You want to get everything in writing. You want to “control the narrative.” You think if you just explain it the right way, they’ll understand.

Wrong.

Email is not a conversation—it’s a debate with a delay. And when emotions are high, it’s the worst way to handle an upset client.  

Here’s why you should be picking up the phone instead of crafting the perfect email—and what to send when you do use email (because yes, sometimes you still need it).

Why Email Makes Client Complaints Worse

Ever had a client send a long-winded complaint, you reply with a professional, well-thought-out response, and then… they come back with an even angrier email?

Yeah. That’s because email strips out tone, body language, and nuance—and it gives clients time to overthink and escalate. Here’s why it’s a losing battle:

🚫 It turns into a debate. They list grievances, you counter them, they push back—congrats, now you’re in an argument where no one wins.

🚫 Clients read it in their own tone. You might be calm and reasonable, but they’re reading it as aggressive, dismissive, or defensive. (Even if you are nice as hell - in their heads - your an asshole)

🚫 It drags the issue out. Instead of resolving things in a 5-minute call, you’re stuck in a slow-motion argument that lasts days.

🚫 It limits your ability to de-escalate. Over the phone, you can hear their frustration and adjust your tone. Email locks you into whatever they assume about you.

So what should you do instead? Get them on the phone.

How to Actually Handle a Complaint Like a Pro

📞 Step 1: Move the Conversation to a Call
Your first email back should be short, neutral, and focused on getting them on the phone.

💡 Example:
"Hi [Client], I saw your concerns and want to make sure we address them properly. Let’s set up a quick call so I can understand the full situation and work toward a solution. When are you available?"

This does two things:
✔ It removes the “email back-and-forth” option.
✔ It gives them a sense that you actually care.

Most clients, once they hear your voice and see you’re listening, calm down fast.

What If They Refuse to Get on a Call?

Some clients will resist (“I’d rather keep everything in writing”). That’s a red flag—they don’t want resolution, they want a paper trail for an argument.

If they refuse a call, you can reply with:
💡 “I completely understand wanting everything documented. I still think a quick call would be the best way to make sure we’re on the same page. I can follow up with a recap email afterward. Let me know what works for you.”

This reassures them that they’ll still get documentation—but that the actual conversation will happen in real-time.

If they still won’t get on the phone? Keep your reply short, factual, and firm. Do not over-explain. Do not get emotional. And DO NOT DEBATE! 

💡 “I understand your concerns, and here’s what I can do to resolve this: [state solution]. If you have further questions, I’m happy to discuss by phone. Let me know how you’d like to proceed.”

When Email Is Useful (But Only for These 3 Things)

🔹 To confirm a solution after a call – “Per our conversation, we’re moving forward with [agreed solution]. Let me know if you have any other questions.”

🔹 To set boundaries with difficult clients – If they’re being unreasonable, a written response helps document what’s happening.

🔹 To cover your ass if needed – If you suspect they’re gearing up for a public complaint, a calm, professional email can help you if things escalate.

Final Takeaway: Talk First, Type Second

If you remember one thing, let it be this: Client complaints are best handled in real time. Get them on the phone, listen, and solve the problem before it turns into an endless email war.

🚀 Stop debating in your inbox. Start resolving issues like a pro.

Now go check your inbox—who do you need to call instead of email today?